Dr. Sara Nasserzadeh
Creating World Peace | One Relationship at a Time
Author, Speaker, Thinking Partner
I am fascinated by the way connections work. I am most passionate about exploring how they lead to meaningful and fulfilling relationships, the way they help us grow, how they contribute to our awareness of self and others, and how all of these could be seen similarly and differently across relationships, cultures and organizations.
Love by Design | 6 Ingredients to Build a Lifetime of Love
True love should give your heart a break, not a heartbreak!
Recipient of the 2025 Vincent Clark Award from the California Association for Marriage and Family Therapists for significant advances in the field of relational science.
As I am sure you know, the quality of our relationships profoundly shapes the quality of our lives. How we navigate one relationship often reflects how we approach all relationships. Yet, unlike financial or career planning—where clear strategies guide our decisions—we often leave love to chance and luck. But we don’t have to.
In my research and practice for over 2 decades across 41 countries, I’ve identified 8 common relational configurations that reveal how couples connect, and I’ve developed a groundbreaking model of love called the Emergent Love Model. This framework is built on 6 essential ingredients for thriving and lasting relationships: mutual attraction, trust, compassion, respect, shared vision, and loving behavior. These aren’t just buzzwords; they’re actionable, research-driven elements that form the foundation of lasting, fulfilling connections.
Ready to design the loving relationship you desire and deserve? Get your copy of Love by Design today, wherever you buy your books, Kindles, and audiobooks around the world!
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Join the Community
Subscribe to The Common Ground, my monthly newsletter on Substack, where I share expert insights on building thriving relationships, from the bedroom to the boardroom.
Learn exactly where to invest your resources—Time, Energy, Attention and Money—to create the fulfilling connections you desire and deserve.
Plus, you’ll receive exclusive bonus content and be the first to hear about upcoming events and special offers!
Not all attraction strikes like lightning.
Sometimes it unfolds quietly through repeated presence, shared context, familiar eyes, smiles & tone of voice…(something that is used in marketing quite a bit actually!)
Psychologists call it the mere exposure effect: the more we see someone in a positive light and associate them with positive feelings, the more chances that we like them and our trust deepens for them.
💛 Have you ever felt your interest deepen simply because someone kept showing up?
#PsychologyOfLove #relationship #love #lovebydesignbook #emergentlovemodel #emergentlove #attraction
Trust is not made or broken with grand gestures.
It is created by little acts of showing up for one another consistently and reliably and it’s broken with little every day let downs.
What does it mean to be trustworthy? Comment below with your insights. I would love to hear your thoughts 👇🏻
Is there someone that you wish to see this right now? Someone that has your trust? Someone that you wish to trust again? Feel free to share this post with them and make it a point of conversation to deepen your relationship🙌🏼🫶🏻
#trust #love #lovebydesignbook #couples #friendship #selfawareness #trusting #partners #thrivingrelationships #drsaranasserzadeh
Friends 💕It’s November already and soon, another year will come to an end.
I wonder if we are surrounded by people that enrich our lives in meaningful ways or otherwise!
This month in my newsletter (the Common Ground in substack), I am sharing my thoughts about the importance of our communities and offer practical tips as well as a wotksheet to help you with designing your social capital.
Read, share, subscribe, let me know of your dilemmas, questions and what you wish for me to wrote about next ✨👇🏻
Look for the link of “the common ground” in my bio or just type “Nasserzadeh, common ground, substack”.
#November #friendship #love #life #socialcapital #TheCommonGround #substack
Respect, literally, means “to look again.” In your relationships, do the people close to you truly hold you in high regard? Do they consider you in both small and big decisions, and do you do the same for them?
What are the clearest signs of respect or disrespect for you?
Is there someone you care about with whom you’d like to build a shared language around respect? Share this post with them 🙌🏼🫶🏻
#respect #love #lovebydesignbook #emergentlovemodel #emergentlove #couples #relating #thrivingrelationships #respecting #respectful #respectable #
Holidays are approaching…
Is there someone that you care about deeply who needs to see this today? 🫶🏻
#selfawareness #alcohol #soberissexy #sober #holidays #family #marriage #friendship #caring #love #community #healthylivingtips
Still buoyed by a restorative night with the radiant @dina, who hosted with such grace, the amazing @terricole sharing her wisdom from her book Boundary Boss, and the grounding presence of @selflovebyshannonkim .
A circle of women holds a power that words can hardly capture.
Overflowing with gratitude and love. 🙏🏼💗
@godmothersbooks and staff 🫶🏻🙏🏼
#love #community #books #booklovers
If you’ve ever been called a perfectionist, people pleaser, or codependent, you’re not broken. 💫
You were brilliant as a child, developing these patterns to stay safe and connected in the environment you grew up in.
The real question is: Are these habits serving you now?
In my recent live with the insightful @beatrizvictoriaalbinanp we explored this idea through her powerful book “End emotional outsourcing”
Together, we unpacked how these learned responses can be re-understood and reshaped so they serve you as the capable, conscious adult designing the life you desire and deserve.
✨ Take a moment to reflect: which of these patterns show up most for you, are they still serving you in your adult life? and what’s one small shift you’re ready to make today if they are no longer serving you?
Share it in the comments awareness is always the first step toward transformation.
#EmotionalOutsourcing #Perfectionism #PeoplePleaserRecovery #CodependencyHealing #InnerChildWork #SelfAwareness #PersonalGrowth #EmbodyYourInnerLeader #RelationalWellbeing #LoveByDesignbook #DrSaraNasserzadeh #BeatriceVictoriaAlbina #LiveConversation #DesignYourLife #IntentionalLiving #HealingJourney
Asexuality is a valid sexual orientation where someone experiences little or no sexual attraction.
It isn’t celibacy, trauma, or “a phase,” and it exists on a spectrum (gray-ace, demisexual, etc.). Romantic orientation can be separate, for example some aces date, marry, and build deeply loving lives; others don’t.
If this is you (or someone you love), you’re not broken. There are others out there that share your orientation ✨
Two helpful resources for you could be: @trevorproject @aven.pt if you know of any other resources please drop them below in the comments so everyone can use them 🙌🏼
#Asexuality #AceSpec #Demisexual #LGBTQIA #SexualHealth #Psychoeducation #love #selfawareness
Voices of Trust and Impact
